My Personal History… Reminiscing

Interrupting the Black History Month posts.Call this #ThrowBackThursday. The picture is from 1975 and the poem is from 2012. :-)

Reminiscing on the Inner Child

I have lived quietly in the folds of indecision
alternating like waves with spontaneity
wondering where the little girl went

I have a picture of her in my mind
standing in the waves with sunshine on my shoulder
running along the sands of Guaymas
naked and unashamed to show skin like the earth
running with a boy named Sky
in the time before boys could break hearts

I miss the time when I was only human
and so were all the reflections in my eyes
differences were incidental and unimportant
there was a peace and freedom in innocence

loss of innocence is what created the indecision
where the trepidation came from
so I try to hold on to dreams of withstanding

trying to go back to the forest
where the trees screamed
under the sound of the chain saws
but I was the only one there
small enough to hear them

I go back to the garden
and the pig pen and chicken coop
back to the horse pasture
and the dark place under the house
where all the spiders lived
and I was unafraid

we are taught to be afraid you know
told what we should avoid and why
what to hate and why

I wonder sometimes who we would be
if our inner child had been allowed to be brave
allowed to learn about fire by burning
and about darkness by closing our eyes

in the meantime I am lost in dichotomy
wondering where the little girl went
alternating like waves with spontaneity
I have lived quietly in the folds of indecision

Me and Sky in Guaymas circa 1975

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